This journal is now FRIENDS ONLY. That means any entries posted after this one will only be viewable by my Tabulas friends only. Thanks for your cooperation, but this had to be done for reasons I won't discuss but I'm sure most of you know.

I'm tired of being labelled stupid, conservative, foggy, brainwashed, etc., just because my religion is important to me and just because I happen to like George Bush. What's really hurting me is the fact that people who I thought were my friends are calling me this stuff or else implying it. I think it's STUPID to sit around and resort to name calling just because you're mad that John Kerry lost the election. Get over yourselves, people.

My life, in bullets:

- I'm getting A's in all my classes right now.

- I've been spending more time with Jacqui and Ern than ever. I'm so glad they're finally in 9th grade. They truly understand me and where I'm coming from and I feel like I can just be myself with them without having any of my beliefs questioned or riddiculed or mocked.

- As for old friends. I still see Anna, Kim and Jessie occasionally. I see Josh a lot, too. He's been a good friend to me. I don't see Roslyn, or Brendan, Woz, Linden and the other guys much anymore. Also, I miss seeing Rosie and Jacob.

- I'm getting along with my family a lot better now. I've actually sat and talked to them and explained a lot of things, and we're reaching a new level of understanding each other.

- I started going to Fellowship of Christian Athletes and Young Life meetings. I'm going to start doing Bible Study in the mornings before school. Ern and Jacqui are also going to do with with me.

- For the first time in my life, I decided not to observe Halloween this year. It was the best October 31st ever for me.

- The election. It's obvious that Bush is going to win.

It's been a while since I graced this place with my presence. I'm sure all of you who know me know that I've been doing really well with my "new" life. Ern and Jacqui are two great people. It's really nice that they're in high school this year. I didn't realize how much I missed them last year. Also, they're loyal and, unlike so many people I know, they didn't totally ignore all the friendships and fun we had in the past.

The begining of 10th grade has been very smooth. This is our second week of school. It's a lot easier to adjust to things this time around. I know where all of my classes are, at least. This year, I'm really focusing on my work and getting involved in meaningful activities. I was reading some of my entries from a year ago and they cracked me up. I can't believe how concerned I was with friends! I can't believe how much I've changed. I don't spend much time with any of those people anymore, besides Josh, and what's weirder is that I don't care! I feel free to be who I am and free to do anything I want.

My parents are opening up a lot more, too. They're letting me try out more new things and discover for myself what's right and what's wrong. I'm really thankful to them for that. I love my family and I'm so glad I've got them to support me in whatever I do.

Life is great. I couldn't be happier!

Chantal and I are no longer friends. She said some horrible things to me the other day that I won't even repeat, and I just can't believe I ever even considered her my best friend. Not when she obviously has no consideration for other people's problems whatsoever. Unless those problems somehow pertain to her, either she won't care or she'll twist things around so that they are ENTIRELY out of context.

Chantal, I know you'll eventually read this entry, and I hope things you read stick in your mind much better than things you hear. Whatever you might say, I don't want to hear it. I've had enough. Why should I have to waste MY life chasing around after you, making you see things my way, trying to explain things to you...only to have all of that effort not matter because you don't care anyway.

I'm finished. I can take care of myself now. I don't need or depend on you any longer.